September Blog Hop: Beauty, Body & Wellness

I am a little late getting to this month's blog hop.  I went straight from surgery recovery to Las Vegas for Pole Expo and then back to work.  I am having a hard time getting caught up and back on track with how to work and have fun.  Check out other posts on Beauty, Body & Wellness HERE.  

I want to discuss taking care of yourself in general when facing an injury.  I want to discuss weight with Health At Every Size in mind.  I don't want this to become a discussion about weight loss, but I do want to discuss how my body feels right now having been so inactive for the last several months.  

I started my new job in San Francisco last October.  I went from driving in my truck to a job about 25 miles away (up to an hour sitting in traffic) to sitting or standing on a train for 40 minutes with a 7-10 minute walk to the BART station and a 8-12 minute walk to work from the BART station.  Even though I have been pretty active for years, my foot started hurting almost immediately.  It wasn't until January that I actually went to the doctor and found out I have a bone spur in my heel, which was aggravating the plantar fascia and causing pain.  In April, the pain started to become unbearable.  Flash forward to August, when I had surgery to cut the fascia, and now, to September, where I am in the middle of my recovery phase.  Full recovery takes about three months, which will be the first week of November.

My body hurts.  Not always the foot that had surgery (sure, it's sore but it rarely hurts), but the rest of my body hurts from not moving enough.  My opposite hip, knee and foot are in pain.  My lower back hurts.  My mid-back hurts.  All because my body needs more movement.  

I am a compulsive eater.  When I am stressed out, sad, bored, tired, or whatever, I use food as a soothing mechanism.  I have used activity for most of my life to counter-act the overeating.  I had gained some weight a few years back but had maintained a fairly stable weight for at least the past two and a half years.  Removing activity from my life puts me in danger of gaining weight.  I don't want to act like gaining weight is the worst thing that can happen to a person but, for myself, I am not comfortable at this weight and would not like to be any more uncomfortable  Pole dancing is one of the activities I use to keep myself at a comfortable weight.  

Pole dancing is a sport that puts many of us at high risk for injury.  We put a lot of stress on our wrists, arms and shoulders.  Some of us go upside down and are at risk of falling on our heads.  We can pull muscles and throw out our backs.  We smack our legs.  We pinch our inner arms.  We get bruises.  And sometimes when we get injured, we just keep going.  No pain, no gain.  That's what we are told.

That isn't always the best way to deal with an injury.  I was not really able to dance toward the end, but I taught my class right up until surgery.  I don't know if that was the best decision, but I did what I felt I needed to do.  Post-surgery, however, I have tried to be kinder to myself.  Recovery is a very important part of growing and becoming stronger.  

The first two weeks post-surgery, I was on crutches and I sat in my chair and rested, just like the doctor ordered.  I could do some leg lifts and would stretch from the chair, but I did not push any limits.  After I was released to swim, I got in the pool.  I could also do a few more yoga poses and foam rolling on the floor.  At Pole Expo in Vegas, I wasn't technically released to do pole, so I canceled my pole workshop but did sign up for non-pole workshops:  belly dance, exotic fire dance and SWAG with Roz.  They were all a really good introduction back into the world of dance and exercise.

I have recently been released to ride a bike.  I am going to start spin classes next week and am hoping to start yoga in October.  I also plan to return to teaching pole in October.  We have a showcase at the end of October called Trick or Twirl, but I will not be performing.  I don't want to push it.  I have another doctor's appointment at the end of September and hope to be released to hike a little.  Once I am released to jog, I want to start signing up for 5k's again.  I felt like doing races gave me a goal to work towards.

So, if you are facing an injury, even though I know you will be eager to get back to pole as soon as possible, take time to allow your body to heal properly.  In the long run, it will make you a stronger poler and hopefully help you avoid re-injuring yourself. 

Be well, my pole family!  I miss you all and hope to be back very soon!

June Blog Hop: Things I Wish I'd Known Before I Started Pole Dancing...

This month's blog hop (check out the link to other blogs HERE) is about what we wish we had known before we started pole dancing.  I'm sure there will be plenty of posts about how we didn't know how addictive it would be, or how expensive it would be, so I thought I'd write something slightly different.  (You can also read our leader, Sheena's post about ideas HERE.)  My blog will be: What I wish I had done differently after I started pole dancing.  

When I started pole dancing, I was in the beginning stages of re-gaining weight (for the second time) after my gastric bypass surgery.  I had started a new relationship, and was working from home (after being in an office for years).  Within six months of starting to dance, I also moved into a new place.  I had a lot of things going on, a lot of stress, and I misdirected my anxiety.  

I wish that after I took that very first class on December 2, 2009, I had taken my health and fitness more seriously.  I am not knocking my newly-acquired Health At Every Size beliefs, but I don't think it is disrespectful or improper to say that, regardless of the number on the scale, I did allow myself to stop working out as much and I started to eat a lot more fast food (which helped me gain all this weight in the first place in college).  HAES believes everyone has a right to be treated with respect regardless of their weight, while acknowledging that bodies are entitled to healthy foods and that movement is good for most bodies.  

Anyway, as I started working from home, I really let my gym schedule get out of whack.  I stopped working out with my super awesome gym partner who kept me motivated.  My gym eventually went out of business and I just stopped going at all for awhile.  I have now gained 50 pounds over my personal healthy weight goal (about 25-30 of those pounds were gained since I started pole dancing).  

I didn't initially stress about some of that weight.  Shoot, the two months I did silks, I put on 15 pounds, and I was pretty sure a lot of that was muscle.  My weight has been somewhat stable for the last two years but my friend took my measurements recently and I'm bigger.  A lot bigger.  That means my "muscle has turned to fat" (no, I don't believe muscle actually turns to fat, however since muscle is purported to weigh more than fat, I can acknowledge that if I have lost muscle tone, and gained fat, I may in fact weigh the same but could have gained inches).  Sure, I kinda felt like my clothes were tighter but I guess I didn't really notice it.  But now I'm hyper-aware (and it's a constant struggle to try to accept myself in the HAES way while still trying to bring myself back to a healthy place). 

I realize that there are some things my body needs (and I feel will help me on the pole).  I need cardio.  I am not doing advanced tricks, so I feel like I shouldn't be heaving and breathing like someone who just finished a marathon after dancing a 4 minute song.  I need yoga.  I am not flexible, and yoga is a requirement.  With all the surgical scars on my body, yoga is probably the one thing I should never go without.  I feel like weight training is essential but I do consider pole my weight bearing exercise.  Last of all, the core is key.  Having to give up my pilates reformer class was one of the biggest bummers of being broke and commuting to work every day.  

So I wish I had not given up on myself when I started to pole.  My downer attitude has nothing to do with pole (and pole has probably kept me from truly going to a dark place many a day!!).  But I do wish I had continued to work hard at the gym, which made me a healthier, happier person.  I don't wish to be skinny, but I do wish to be in good health again.  

I did have a bad week this week (thanks to my bone spur) but have been attending cycle classes 1-2 days a week, yoga 1-2 days a week and pole 2 days a week.  In the mornings before work, I do some exercises for my foot that have me doing things like calf raises.  I do hope to turn that back into core workout time soon.  I have been battling this painful bone spur for almost 9 months now.  I do hope as that gets resolved (probably looking at surgery this year for it), I can fully get back into my schedule and make myself into the pole dancer that I have always dreamed of being.