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Thursday, September 24, 2015

Wipeout Run


Last month I joined a few friends (and my brother) and did the Wipeout Run (my sister-in-law and baby girl joined to cheer us on).  Much like the TV show (although a lot easier), we faced obstacles, all while running a 5k in the South Bay heat.  Luckily, this day wasn't one of those 100 degree days.  I think it was only in the mid-80's, however, running around without cover in the blazing sun still lead to overheating and a sunburn.


Leading up to the event, my only true concern was not whether I would injure myself, it was whether or not the life jacket would fit over my monster boobs.  My second (minor) concern was whether I would be able to keep up with the rest of my group, who were way more fit than me.  When we arrived and joined the cattle call to wait for our turn to run, there was a guy hyping up the crowd.  We were laughing and dancing (and preparing ourselves for our sunburns).  Once the horn blew, we were off.  Our group ran off toward obstacle one.  I almost ran the entire way.  But after that, I was too tired and too hot to keep up that pace.  My group didn't complain much (although Jessica DID make us walk the entire 5k instead of letting me cheat and take shortcuts in a couple of places).  Boo.  

Most of the obstacles were fun and had very little danger of actually hurting us.  However, the big red balls were a little more daunting.  My experience in watching the show, and others who went ahead of me, is that the danger is bouncing off ball 1, face planting into ball 2 and then backwards taco'ing and kicking yourself in the back of the head, thereby destroying your back.  NCPP was the following weekend, and I just couldn't afford an injury.  So, I bitched out and just kind of jumped around the sides of the balls and made half-assed attempts to actually jump on the balls from the ground (instead of jumping off the platform).  I left lots of face sweat on the balls for the next person though.  I was okay with that.

As I was walking with my crowd toward an obstacle in the middle, I hear: Is that Lori?!  It seems like I can't go anywhere without seeing someone I know!  Danielle, another Twirly Girl, was running the course with her husband and some friends.  We bounced through the next obstacle together and then they were off (because they were actually running).

The next stressor came towards the end, when I had to try on that life jacket.  I had watched videos, which showed zip-up life jackets.  Those would never fit.  I even e-mailed the promoters to explain my plight.  I was assured that their life jackets went up to XL and I would be just fine.  XL.  hahaha!  This chick has never seen my boobs!!!!  As we walked up, I saw a really big dude with a jacket on, completely un-done.  But I noticed, it had buckles!!  No zippers!  I picked up my XL, let out the straps and put my life jacket on.

The whole course took us two hours to walk, but we had the best time.  I would definitely do it again, so I hope it comes around again next year!








Wednesday, September 16, 2015

Chunky Girl Comics at Wizard World San Jose

Labor Day weekend, I had the pleasure of once again donning the Candy costume and joining my fellow Chunky Girls (and boy) for a panel discussion at Wizard World in San Jose.

Although we knew our body diversity panel was set to be the first discussion of the day, when Marisa and I turned to corner to our room, and saw it was already full of people, we backed out, believing we had accidentally walked into the end of a previous panel.  We sat outside for a few minutes, then looked at the sign again, which reminded us that we were first up that day.  Holy shit, all those people were there...waiting...for us!  We peeked around the corner, noticed the panel table was empty and our name tents were there, so we sheepishly walked into the room and took our places.

The panel was fantastic!  I realize I am a nerd-in-training, and so some of the conversation was over my head, but the discussion was not only about diversity in body type but also in race (both in comics and movies).  It could very easily been an uncomfortable or heated conversation but everyone was extremely respectful and I felt like it was very productive.

I would like to (once again) thank Marisa of Chunky Girl Comics for including me on these awesome adventures, Gia for being reliable and fun-sized, and Ray of Tragic Hero Comics for being our Chunky Boy nerd in the know.  His knowledge of comics always impresses me.

After the panel, we stayed to sign autographs and take photos.  Again, we were so surprised and humbled by the number of people willing to wait to talk to us.  It was just such a great day and an amazing experience.  Of course, there were plenty of shenanigans, including celebrity stalking and planned debauchery (which really didn't go down as I had hoped).

On Sunday, we headed into Wizard World one last time before leaving for the weekend,  We happened past Josh McDermitt and Michael Cudlitz from The Walking Dead in the hotel lobby.  Marisa and I stood just close enough (but we thought, just far enough away), trying to decide whether we should say hi.  Suddenly, we hear one of them say loudly (pretty sure it was Josh): "And then I killed a goat and spread its blood all over my body!"  Soooooooo, we left.  The bonus was Marisa got to meet Dean Cain (of Superman fame) at Peet's two seconds later.  We still should have gone over to talk to TWD dudes!

As always, pictures speak louder than words, so enjoy a few photos of our adventures from that weekend.  We are very much looking forward to Wizard World Reno in November!














Tuesday, September 15, 2015

NCPP - Pat the Bear Turns Two

Well, we did it again.  Call us crazy, but Ellen and I survived another year and brought Northern California Pole Presentational to the Bay Area once again.  

I have to be honest.  I was tired this year.  New job (love it but it has longer hours and I had to completely re-do my after-work schedule so as not to burn myself out).  Less pole.  I just wasn't sure I wanted to keep doing this.  So many late nights and long weekends spent on the computer.  Planning.  Sending e-mails.  Gathering music.  Spreadsheets.  Scheduling.  Stressing.  But when the day arrived, I was reminded why it was all worth it.  We certainly aren't doing this for the money.  I'm barely doing it for the love of pole.  We do this to be part of a larger community.  For me, it is all worth it because of all the happy faces that I saw coming off that stage.

I really do want to personally thank each and every person who participated that day -- the judges, volunteers, vendors, sponsors, studios, audience members.  I am grateful to The Stage for providing us with a legit theater.  I am eternally grateful to Ellen, who keeps me on track and helps balance our workload.  I could not do this without her.  And I am ever so grateful for the dancers.  This show is for THEM.  I am not a natural performer (or even that great of an unnatural performer).  I am always terrified to perform, so I have the utmost respect for the performers who are spending their time and effort preparing to dance for us.  This year, thanks to the awesome cyborg headsets, Ellen and I got to actually watch a good portion of the show.  I am always amazed by the artistic beauty that pole dance inspires.  NCPP performers did not disappoint!

We posted a note on the NCPP blog yesterday.  Please visit that post and check out the eloquent thank you posted by Ellen on Facebook.  We have just signed the contract for next year and will be announcing the new date soon!  Please keep an eye on our Facebook page for updates and photos and we will see you next year!

Thanks for fulfilling my fantasies -- so many groups and duos!

Monday, September 14, 2015

Chunky Girl Comics on KTVU!

Marisa and I recently filmed a segment about Chunky Girl Comics with Bay Area People on KTVU Channel 2.  We had such a great time.  As soon as I walked into the room, I just wanted to sit on the newsroom desk.  Claudine Wong said, why not?!  So up I went!  Thank you, Claudine for being so awesome!  I feel so grateful for Marisa and the adventures we are experiencing with Chunky Girl Comics.  If you are going to a local comic book convention, let them know you want to see Chunky Girl Comics there!

Check out the segment below!








Sunday, August 23, 2015

Review of Artista Active Wear's Monokini

Recently, I posted a photo of myself wearing Artista Active Wear's monokini on Instagram and I received messages asking how well it supported "the girls."  So, Saturday, I went to the studio to test it out.  I did video my review, but apparently didn't realize that camera wasn't focused, so I figured a written review and pieces of my dance on video should suffice.  I recorded this dance at 9:30 PM on a Saturday, after having participated in the Wipeout Run (a 5k with ten obstacles) that same afternoon (and after spending over four hours in the car going to and from the event).  I got ridiculously sunburned.  And I haven't been doing regular pole classes since starting my new job in February.  Now that the disclosures are out of the way, don't expect much from the actual dance.  Just watch the movements and see how the outfit moves with me.

In the interest of full disclosure, I was recently invited to be a Brand Ambassador for Artista.  However, I did purchase this item with my own money.  This review would be the same whether I was reppin' them or not.

First off, I loved how the monokini looked.  I did order a size up (XXXL), as I felt I was between sizes, and I probably would have been fine with the XXL.  Second off, I loved how it felt.  It was comfortable to wear.  No riding up or slipping down.  And no dreaded back rolls.

Now, for how the girls reacted.  In the category of "TMI," although most people probably do know, and again, in the interest of full disclosure, I had a breast lift nine years ago.  However, my boobs are way bigger and sit way lower than I would like.  That being said, they are still way perkier than the boobs I used to have.  If I had tried to wear this outfit back then, my boobs would not have stayed in place.  However, I do have a halter dance bra that would fit just fine under the monokini.  I have to say, though, that I loved that this outfit didn't give me a back roll, and I imagine a bra under it might do that.

At the end of the day, though, I did love the outfit and would recommend it.  If you want to see it in action, check it out below.  And if you want to order it (or anything else) for yourself, you can use my discount code for 10% off: ABALM10.  Just visit www.artistaactivewear.com.

Check out the video and let me know if you have any questions!



Thursday, August 13, 2015

Off The Floor: a pole dance documentary

I was recently offered the opportunity to watch Off The Floor, a documentary about Jessica Anderson-Gwin and her dance troupe, Jagged.  I had been a fan of Jagged for many years, but had NO idea of their history.  This month is kind of crazy with NCPP coming up, and I felt like I wouldn't have enough time to fit it in, but something drew me to say yes.  I am so glad I did.

The stereotypical theme of stripper versus modern dance is definitely interwoven throughout the film.  While I tend to shy away from having that argument (strippers do also use poles, so if that is a problem, maybe this isn't the right dance outlet for you....), as a person with a somewhat conservative day job, I do understand it.  I also understand the struggle to find the proper venue for a show.  Not only do the ceilings need to be high enough, and the set-up needs to be right, but the venue has to understand what you'll be doing.  In the beginning of the movie, Jess is calling venues to set up a show, and then tries to explain what pole dance is.  I feel like I made those exact same calls in the early days of the creation of NCPP.  We really only lucked out with a fantastic venue because Ellen had connections.  Otherwise, almost three years later, I might still be making those calls.

It was absolutely amazing to see where Jagged trains.  I don't want to ruin the movie for anyone, but you have to watch it for the sheer brilliance of how their practice space gets set up.  Seriously, I want to live there.  I mean, you know, if they had a space like that here in Northern California that wasn't on International Boulevard in Oakland.  It really does show you the heart that these ladies have.  It is the love of dance and pole that drives them to make due with what they have and create a most beautiful show.  


In case I haven't mentioned it before, I LOVE GROUPS!  I don't want to discount all of the amazing solo dancers I have watched, and I have been very lucky to see some of the most famous pole dancers in person.  I have been completely spoiled to see the best of the best perform.  So I feel like watching the creativity that comes out when a group of polers gets together is like eating the most delicious chocolate and the calories not counting (it's a serious compliment from a fat girl).  

The movie not only follows the path of Jagged and Jessica from approximately 2010 to 2014, but also includes interviews from some of my favorite pole celebrities and pioneers of modern pole.  I also recognized many of the dancers in Jagged from various showcases and competitions that I have attended.  It was a lot of fun to put the pieces together and realize how many of these girls I had watched before.  I also feel like Jagged was way before its time.  Pole was very much a solo gig all the way back in 2010.  I started poling in 2009.  I attended California Pole Dance in 2010.  All solos.  Pole Show LA had some doubles and groups.  Then Pole Convention had doubles and groups.  I'm sure there were plenty of doubles and groups happening before I realized it but I still remember seeing Mina and Nadia perform for the first time and being completely blown away.  I also remember watching Jagged compete at Masters (maybe this was 2012 or 2013?  I'm getting old).  They were beautiful to watch, and perhaps that is where my love affair with groups began.  

I really believe that polers should watch this documentary.  It does a great job of showing, not only how pole dancers are often treated, but how difficult it is to be an artist.  These ladies put their hearts, souls, and, often, all of their money into this art.  This movie is especially for those polers who are just starting to dance.  For every one of them who won't have to hear, "isn't pole dancing for strippers?"  (Because, let's be honest, even if you support strippers, it gets old when everyone asks you that question.)  A debt of gratitude is owed to all of the pole dancers that came before them.  Fawnia in 1994.  Sheila in 2000.  And every amazing poler since.  One of the girls in the movie had a great line:  The pioneers are the ones with the arrows in their back.  I believe that Jessica and Jagged are part of pole history and I applaud them for sharing themselves with us in this movie.  


Jessica is competing this weekend in PSO's Nationals championship.  In honor of Jess, Off The Floor is offering a $3 discount off the price of the movie.  Just use the code: USNPC.  I am a busy person and I often find myself having a hard time sitting through movies, but I found this one to be engaging and completely worth 90 minutes.  The website is:  www.offthefloormovie.com.  

Go watch it, come let me know what you thought, then wish Jessica good luck this weekend at Nationals!

Tuesday, May 26, 2015

Cleo's Rock N Pole

Last month, I took on the challenging of trying Cleo's Rock N Pole website.  In the interest of full disclosure, I was provided a free month of lessons in exchange for reviewing the site.  My plan was to approach the lessons from the perspective of a plus-sized pole dancer who no longer has a pole at home.

Cleo's Rock N Pole is a combination of Cleo's previously-produced DVDs, as well as new lessons and challenges by Cleo, in addition to some videos by guest instructors.  I like how the lessons are grouped.  There are clearly marked sections for the warm-up, fundamentals/pole (broken down by level), floor/chairplay or strength/flexibility training.  In the Rock N Pole section, you can find cute choreographed routines.  I found there were plenty of lessons for someone who does not have a pole at home.  I especially was interested in flexibility and strengthening exercises as I feel like I am constantly battling weight issues and injuries.

I enjoyed the Rockin Legs N Abs (RLNA) daily challenges (found under flexibility).  I was able to follow the videos fairly easily, although I have to say that Cleo moves really quickly.  I would sometimes catch myself trying to keep up, but felt like I was sacrificing my form.  I noticed that when I did some of the moves at half time, I was still sore and sweaty at the end, so it was good to listen to my body.  I really appreciated that Cleo's voice overs often offered modifications and encouraged beginners (or inflexible people like me) to be careful about pushing themselves into moves for which they aren't ready.  The lessons are also accompanied by specific hashtags so you can take to social media to search for others who may be doing the same challenge if you have questions or need motivation.

I would say the hardest thing about doing any kind of home workout is the fact that you are trying to do it alone.  It can set you up to injure yourself, it can be lonely, and it can be hard to motivate yourself to continue the program.  Cleo has a really active group on Facebook called Rockin' Legs N' Abs.  It is a great place to connect with others to receive the moral support that you may sometimes need to motivate yourself to bang out that late night workout even though you're exhausted.  With members from around the world, you will probably always find someone online and willing to chat.  Cleo's site also offers a blog and community tab to help people connect as well.  My biggest concern with any DVD or online workout videos is that those new to this kind of workout may injure themselves.  I believe if you have spent any time in group exercise classes, though, you usually know well enough if you are doing something you shouldn't.  If it hurts, stop.  Definitely talk to your doctor if you are just starting up a workout program for the fist time.

I am an extremely inflexible human so a month of working on my flexibility didn't really give me noticeable results.  I am 18 years into doing yoga and the fact that I can now touch my toes in a forward bend is a huge accomplishment.  However, I did really enjoy Cleo's workouts.  I hope that you will check out her site and then come back and tell me what you thought!


Monday, May 11, 2015

Sixth Annual Lovely Rita Fundraiser

Last month, Twirly Girls hosted the SIXTH annual Lovely Rita Fundraiser to benefit the National Kidney Foundation.  It does not seem possible that we are six years into throwing these events, but we are!  Late last year, I asked the other instructors to do one long instructor piece instead of each of us dancing separately (this is a popular show, and we could very easily end up with 25+ performances if we aren't careful).  They said yes!  (Although not everyone was excited about my song choice.)  If you want to donate to the cause, please visit THIS link.

Then watch our video and leave a comment with your thoughts!




Monday, May 4, 2015

Chunky Girl Comics at Big Wow Comicfest 2015

Chunky Girl Comics has returned to Big Wow Comicfest!  [You can see photos from last year's adventure HERE.]  In addition to Marisa's table, we were privileged to sit on a panel: Fierce, Fab and Fluffy, which discussed body diversity and plus sized issues in comics and pop culture.  It was another amazing event.  It was so much fun, seeing old faces and meeting new ones.  We ran into Damion Poitier again (who makes me turn into a bumbling idiot who can't find their words, and who is one of the nicest celebrities I've ever met).  The day ended in a mechanical "bull" ride...in a corset.  I have much love to those guys for helping me not fall off.  It's hard enough to ride that thing...it was even harder when you can't bend!!  Video does exist.  Check it out on the fan page:

Riding the bull. In a corset.
Posted by Confessions of a Twirly Girl on Saturday, April 18, 2015


Thanks again to Marisa, Gia and Jess for another awesome Chunky Girl event!

Getting ready


lil bit helping me get ready

The amazing Ray of Tragic Hero Comics

Saw my friend, Jenna!

Prom pose!  Again.  

Damion Poitier


Philip

Best day ever

Thank you, Marisa for catching these awesome shots!


Monday, April 27, 2015

Trying out Cleo's Rock N Pole

Last week I posted a video and wanted to make sure I shared it here as well.  This month I'm trying out Cleo's Rock N Pole.  I don't have a pole at home but there are still tons of lessons for me!  If you want to join me, check out my video below.

Tuesday, March 31, 2015

Liquid Motion at Kitty Kats Korner

Last weekend, I paid Kitty Kats Korner a visit to take a Liquid Motion doubles workshop.  Our instructor was the lovely Danielle Mayzes. Our gracious host, Sandra, who owns Kitty Kats Korner, is also a certified Liquid Motion instructor. 

Ginger and I have been dancing together for awhile now.  Probably going on two years.  She has been a fan of Liquid Motion so often she incorporates that into our routines, but I had never taken any formal classes.  I remember being at Pole Convention in 2012 when the ladies of Liquid Motion performed (Jeni Janover Stephanie Skyy, Danielle Mayzes and Danielle Romano).  It was mesmerizing.  Bodies moving so fluidly, crossing paths without effort.  They would come together and move apart and sometimes you didn't know where one person started and the other ended.  It was sexy in a very sensual but non-stripper way (not that there's anything with dancing in the "stripper way").  I don't know how to explain it.  It was just different.  You can view that video HERE.

Anyway, Ginger said Liquid Motion was coming to town, so away we went!  Ginger did FOUR workshops on Saturday.  FOUR.  And they were each 90-120 minutes long.  She's a badass.  I did my regular class with Ellen in the morning, then came out just for the doubles workshop, which did last two hours.  I went straight to a massage (which was actually kind of brutal).  I could barely move the next day.

I think the assumption was that most people came with a partner or at least had someone there they knew well enough to bump and grind on and slither around on the ground with (there was one hetero couple who were super sexy to watch).  So, of course, the whole reason I was there was to dance with Ginger.  But before we even got started, there was a mention of switching partners.  We could opt out...but I didn't want to be the sissy baby.  So I said, OF COURSE I will dance with other partners!  Then I cried a little on the inside.

Now, part of why I love dancing with Ginger is because she doesn't judge me.  She doesn't judge my fat.  Or my ridiculous sweat (of which there is always a ton).  She doesn't care that I can't dance that well.  Ginger just accepts me.  And not many people do that.  So, for me to say, of course I'm cool switching partners, is also me forcing myself further outside of my comfort zone.  And that is why I'm there, right?

So, we begin class together.  Ginger and I.  We warm up.  We do some log rolls.  But the time comes when we are supposed to switch.  I see people pairing up.  And I'm like the kid at the playground who doesn't want to get picked last.  It was a really unnecessary vulnerable moment for me.  I see Brie sitting against the wall.  Brie isn't stressed about finding a partner.  I have always liked Brie.  She has always been nice to me and she exudes confidence.  I respect that.  So I crawled up...will you be my partner?  Brie says yes!  Score!  But here's where the fear sets in.  Will she be disgusted by my sweaty body?  We are rolling all over the floor together.  But she didn't miss a beat.  If it did bug her, she kindly didn't let it show.  She's closer to my height, and also has ginormous boobs like mine, so it was a good match.  Later, I got brave again and switched to April.  Again, slightly closer to my height with boobs.  And so I got to fly in some moves that I could have only based before.  For the record, April is as freaking strong as an ox.  I kept worrying that I was going to squish her but she never failed me.  I have to admit, I did drop us once.  My chaturanga was not strong!

Anyway, I won't give away the secrets of Liquid Motion but I really did enjoy the class.  It was humbling realizing that, even when I feel silly, I can't let go because I'll let my partner down.  This was not just about me.  It was a great feeling to try dancing with new people but I still prefer dancing with Ginger.  We did some breathing and moving in the beginning.  We were asked to really pay attention to who was leading and make sure we both took turns.  There were a few times when it was clear that one of us initiated a move, but I felt like a good portion of that exercise, I absolutely could not tell who was leading.  I think we just are that in tune now.

Danielle was a great instructor.  She had a clear curriculum and was open to suggestions as some of us with different body types talked about how to make certain moves work for us (until we realized we were shoulder rolling the wrong way, Brie and I ate a lot of boob).  I'm always concerned that a thinner instructor won't understand how my larger body works.  But I never felt judged, she was always helpful with suggestions, and was open to listening to us talk about how to make moves work.
I want to thank Sandra and Kitty Kats Korner for opening their home to me once again, and thank you to Danielle for traveling to this coast to teach us how to be liquid!  Thank you Jeanette for taking photos!  And THANK YOU to Ginger for being you.  If you've ever been curious about taking a Liquid Motion workshop, I absolutely recommend it.  They can accommodate all levels.  And, especially if you are shy and feel awkward being sexy, you should make yourself take one of these workshops!

Don't mind my wild hair and creepy face...it was that kind of workshop!

Thursday, March 12, 2015

Cowboy's Wild Adventures - a pole show and a bike ride

So, Robert is doing it again...he's going to ride 545 miles over 7 days to raise money for AIDS LifeCycle.  We came together last weekend to do a pole fundraiser at Club 1220.  It was so much fun!  Check out everyone's videos below.  I am highlighting mine, as Ellen helped me put it together, and despite not turning around in time so everyone could see my underwear properly, it is my absolute favorite routine to date.  

If you would like to donate to the cause, please visit:

http://www.tofighthiv.org/site/TR/Events/AIDSLifeCycleCenter?px=1258305&pg=personal&fr_id=1770








Thursday, February 5, 2015

Twirly Girls on KTVU!

Recently, a KTVU camera crew came to Twirly Girls to film a segment for a show called Bay Area People.  One of our students is an intern so she was one of the producers and editors (hope I got that right, Tiff!) of the piece.  I am so proud of how it turned out!  I mean, I could certainly nitpick my fat face and robot voice, but I really am excited that pole is getting some love on mainstream television. Take a look!

http://www.ktvu.com/clip/11071573/bay-area-people-company-teaches-fitness-with-pole-dancing

Let me know what you think in the comments below!

Thursday, January 29, 2015

Confessions turns Five!

It has been five years since I started this crazy adventure called blogging.  I am so grateful for all of the fun times I've had thanks to the pole dance world, and appreciate the outlet the blogging provides for me.  Enjoy a little slideshow of fun from the past five years!

Monday, January 19, 2015

Negative Self-Talk: Crushing Pole Dancer Dreams Since 2009

This month's blog hop is about five things you should never say to crush a pole dancer's spirit.  Well, considering the only person who crushes my spirit is me, I am going to write about five things we shouldn't say to ourselves.  I am also giving a shout out to Pole Geek, who already wrote a great post on things you should never say to a plus-sized poler, and who used her last item to talk about negative self-talk.

1.  I can't do the same moves as everyone else, so this is pointless.  It's true.  Not every person can do every move.  Some people are stronger.  Some more flexible.  Some more fluid.  That's what makes us all interesting.  If we were all doing the same moves in exactly the same way, pole dance (and life) would be boring, and we'd already be done with it.  Find something you can do well and build around that.  Maybe it is a move -- I can do handstands, which really makes people cheer for me.  Maybe you are insanely fluid.  I remember a girl coming into class one day and she was saying she dropped out of a show because she could only do pirouettes well and she couldn't pirouette for an entire routine.  Maybe not but I get dizzy doing a pirouette, so I find them awesome to watch.  I bet she could start with some dizzying pirouettes and go into some other moves easier than she thinks.  But do yourself a huge favor and don't compare yourself to the rest of class.  We are all good at something!

2.  I can only make it to class once a week, so clearly I'm never going to get better at this.  Well, while it is certainly true that the more you practice, the better you will most likely become, you have to ask yourself why you started pole dancing in the first place.  Are you trying to compete or participate in high level showcases?  Then, sure, you should be practicing more often than once a week.  Are you exploring a new type of movement and enjoying the benefit of exercise?  Then there's nothing wrong with coming to class once a week.  I don't know about your class, but my weekly pole class wasn't just about exercising.  It was about seeing friends, laughing and enjoying the mental release that comes with closing my eyes and dancing.

3.  I'll try pole once I've lost five (ten...twenty...fifty) pounds.  If I waited for weight loss to do anything in life, I'd truly never do anything.  Get out there and try things now.  The best way to get strong for pole dance is to try it (notice I didn't say the best way to lose weight for pole dance...).  I have very literally spent my entire life worrying about my weight.  Drink Slim Fast, drop 20 pounds in a week.  Weight Watchers, yo-yo up and down.  Even after gastric bypass, I have been as low as 180 pounds (extremely slim for my frame) and have crept back up to 260 pounds (and have been every weight in between).  If I only did fun things during the times that I felt like I was thinner or was at least losing weight, I would have wasted most of my life.  I'm over that.  I get that there may be physical limitations based on what I weigh (I think zip-lining has a 250 pound limit, but I didn't enjoy zip-lining anyway), but for the most part, if I want to do something, I go do it.

4.  I can't wear those tiny shorts.  Okay, then don't.  But after the first class of sliding around in your yoga pants, you won't be able to wait to get into some shorts.  Our very first aerial move (called a sliding prayer) requires a little skin and stick.  Pretty much everyone who tells me they don't want to wear the short-shorts is in them by class 2 or 3 (and I would say the majority of them are looking for shorts in the lost and found before their first class is even over).  One thing I learned in my class is that no one is looking at me or my cottage cheese thighs.  They're all too worried about themselves!  So bring your yoga pants but make sure you have some shorts hidden in your bag.  Trust me, you'll thank me later!

5.  I can't pole dance because my family and friends will think I'm a whore.  The stereotype is still there.  I still get the lifted eyebrow when I tell some people that I pole dance (however, more often I get the "holy shit, that is so cool, when can I come try it" reaction).  So I am careful about who I tell (not always something I reveal on the first day of a new job).  I realize that my personality is pretty gruff.  I don't take a lot of shit from people, I don't waste time with people who aren't worth my time and I generally don't care what people think about me.  That's actually not true.  I do somewhat care what people think, but I am grown up enough to know that what they think about me says more about them than it does about me.  And I remind myself of that when dealing with many, many, many, many people in my life.  The pole dancer in me says, who cares if pole dance came from the strip clubs?  Mind your business.  The real-life-job-holding-religious-family-having person in me realizes it's never just that simple.  Pole dance certainly isn't for everyone.  But I would hope that you would try a class (and encourage the haters to join you) before passing judgment.  Because most of the haters I've brought to class can't use their arms the next day and have a new-found respect for pole dance.

Can you think of some soul-crushing things you've said to yourself during your pole dance journey?  Please share them below in the comments!  Also, please read the other entries in this month's blog hop!