October Blog Hop: Stripping the Stripper out of Pole Dance

This month, the Pole Dancing Bloggers Association is talking about the sanitization of pole dance.  This Trick or Treat blog hop marks the first anniversary of our blog hop!  I feel very fortunate to be surrounded by so many talented pole dancers and writers!  Happy birthday to us!

So back to the topic at hand...I have written on this subject many times before and thought this might be a good time for a recap! 

Way back in March of 2010, I weighed in on the debate about pole in the Olympics.  The push was (and still is, for some groups) to remove the "sexy" from pole in order to make it more palatable for the general population and the Olympics.  My response was, and still is, "meh."  I don't really care if pole dancing makes it into the Olympics.  I now understand what a great undertaking it will be to even have it considered.  The Olympic Games are chosen YEARS in advance, and although there is a group working hard to make it reality, it will probably be another 12 to 16 years before it could even be a possibility.  So, the people who would most likely be competing in the first Olympics to include pole, probably aren't even born yet. 

In February of 2011, I discussed stripping versus pole fitness.  I mostly list other blogs which have discussed the topic, but my general feeling is this:  "...for me to look down on stripping and call myself only a pole fitness enthusiast would be almost disrespectful to the roots of my sport.  I have said on many occasions that if I had a better body and a little more rhythm, I wouldn't be opposed to making some money as a stripper!"

Only a month later, the topic came up again.  Mostly I discuss with myself the reasons that stripping automatically turns into prostitution in some people's minds.  Do all strippers have to get sucked into the dark side of drugs and prostitution?  I had only one person respond to my questions, and I'd love to get more opinions on the subject.

In January of 2012, we were discussing the stripper versus pole dancer debate...again.  In it, I mention my foot in mouth syndrome, and it is where I realize I cannot make everyone happy.  Some people are okay with pole dancing being sexy.  Some people are not.  One of my favorite quotes is from Claire of The Pole Story:  "If for some reason, the idea of your dancing being connected to the strip club scene is upsetting to you, if you desperately need to distance what you do from what those 'other girls' do, if you truly believe that you are doing this because it’s just a really good workout, then I strongly suggest you spend some time thinking about why you chose pole dancing.  Because there are a million ways to get fit without putting on six inch stilettos, a bikini and swinging sensually around a pole." 

The winning quote of the day, though, came from Shimmy's blog:  "It's completely normal that not everyone will like what you do. As the pole movement gains momentum, and new skills are created, it's going to get harder and harder to impress people. People will become more discerning, and competitive. Sometimes, people will comment on other people's style of dance as a way of defining their own style. An example of this is a traditional 'sexy' pole dancer saying she doesn't like contemporary pole, or a former ballerina saying she hates body rolls and hair flicks. What they're really saying is that they've adopted a particular style as their favourite way to pole dance, to the exclusion of other styles. That's ok too - there's room enough in the pole world for many different ways of pole dancing, and it's quite exciting to see new styles develop and change."

In February of 2012, Twirly Girls was asked to perform for a local radio show.  The show later accused one of our girls of being a "bitter stripper" after she was a little defensive in answering their questions.  I didn't want her to feel attacked but part of me thought, "Who cares if she was a stripper, bitter or not?!  It doesn't make her any less of an amazing pole dancer."  I struggled then, and sometimes do now, to make sure I don't force my own opinions on everyone else:  "I don't want to disconnect from my pole community either.  If it is offensive to some to be called a stripper, am I belittling them by telling them to get over it?  On the other hand, do we owe it to the 'pole fitness' community to explain to the general public that there is a bit of a difference between stripping for dollars and taking classes at a pole fitness studio?  Granted, I like working out and feeling stronger but I really enjoy putting on 'stripper heels' and cute clothes too."

"It seems like a lot of the negativity and disharmony comes from WITHIN our own pole dancing community. Some spend so much time debating the words we should use to describe what we do -- and even more time judging other dancers in the industry.  I think we need to first band together, then we can worry about what the outsiders think."

And, finally in June of 2012, I wrote about the difference between "pole fitness" and "pole dancing."  I also discussed the World Pole Sport Championship, which is part of the push to get pole into the Olympics.  "I feel like pole fitness competitions or showcases usually leave the six inch stilettos out.  They seem to be more tricks/contortion-based.  And I feel like pole dancing competitions should encompass the beauty of the dance, sexy or not, and may or may not include shoes (perhaps this is where the difference between pole art and pole exotic might come in)."

For me, I love the art and the dance.  I also love the strength and flexibility required.  I love Chinese pole, contortion and acrobatics.  I love ballet and jazz and the interesting dance pieces that are being showcased lately.  I love the costumes, crazy make-up and hair styles.  I love the shoes, but I love barefoot dancers too.  I love that women dance.  I love that men dance.  I love it all.  So, be sexy or don't.  Be sexy this routine and not the next.  I think what makes pole amazing is the ability for each performer to bring their own personality to each and every routine.  Also, some of the most memorable routines for me were ones that never won the competition.  However, they were interesting to watch -- some sexy, some not.  Be different.  Be interesting.  Be you.  That's what makes a great pole dancer. 

Sorry this was a long one, but this is a debate we will probably have to endure for the rest of our lives.  How do you feel about being sexy in pole dance?  

To read other blogs on this topic, please click HERE. 

Ummmm....I'm a Pole ARTIST

Continuing with the pole dancer versus stripper debate...  Get caught up here:  http://lolorashel.blogspot.com/2012/01/stripper-versus-pole-dancer-debate.html

A couple of weeks ago, Twirly Girls were part of a local radio show's live event [http://lolorashel.blogspot.com/2012/02/twirly-girls-at-sarah-vinnie-secret.html].  Going into the event, I knew the "stripper thing" was going to come up.  The general public associates pole dancing with stripping.  As we know, one can mean the other.  But it doesn't have to.  I warned the girls that the topic would most likely come up.  I figured it would be mostly in good fun since Sarah and Vinnie have an entertainment show to put on.  It did come up and the S&V show felt like one of our girls in particular was a little bitter in her response.  I didn't think she actually came across bitter or mad, but I know her and they don't, so maybe that's why the disconnect happened.  Either way...on the radio a day or two later, they made the point that we are all swinging on a stripper pole, so we shouldn't be that shocked when the subject came up.  

In my mind, they are right.

Are you a stripper?  A pole dancer?  A pole fitness enthusiast?  A pole artist?  There are many names for what we do.  And there's nothing wrong with being any one of those things, or all of them.  But when someone says to you, "oh you pole dance?!"  Are you the first to say, "but I'm not a stripper!"?

Now this is where I get stuck.  If someone comes at me with the whole, "oooh, so you're a stripper, right?" thing, I usually respond with, "If I had a nicer body and a little more rhythm, I'd definitely consider it!"  But I also grew up in a religious home where acting out and being a little naughty held some appeal.  I've also spent many years learning how to ignore those who tried to make me feel bad about myself or guilty for things that I do.  I sometimes forget not everyone has had that kind of life training. 

I don't want to disconnect from my pole community either.  If it is offensive to some to be called a stripper, am I belittling them by telling them to get over it?  On the other hand, do we owe it to the "pole fitness" community to explain to the general public that there is a bit of a difference between stripping for dollars and taking classes at a pole fitness studio?  Granted, I like working out and feeling stronger but I really enjoy putting on "stripper heels" and cute clothes too.  

In my mind, I say, take me or leave me...I owe you no explanation for anything I do or say.  However, I feel like some of my pole sisters may feel like I am not hearing them or taking their feelings into account. 

At the end of the day, regardless of the words we use to describe what we do, we're still doing it -- swinging around a pole.  And, it's like some of us are almost waiting for the fight...waiting for that outsider to bring up pole dancing, daring them to call us a stripper, so we can attack and explain that we are pole artistes!  We should not be ashamed of what we do.  I feel like if we make excuses and try to distance ourselves from stripping, it almost becomes, "we doth protest too much..."   

It seems like a lot of the negativity and disharmony comes from WITHIN our own pole dancing community. Some spend so much time debating the words we should use to describe what we do -- and even more time judging other dancers in the industry.  I think we need to first band together, then we can worry about what the outsiders think.

At the end of the day, a person who will judge you for pole dancing, doesn't care if you're a stripper or not.  They will judge you the same.  So why not hold your head high and proudly proclaim:  YES, I AM A POLE DANCER [or insert your favorite term here]!  That's what I plan to do. 

The "stripper" versus "pole dancer" debate

So one of the questions I have asked in the past of my blog interviewees is what they think about the "stripper vs. pole fitness debate."  It is clear that some people are very comfortable with pole dancing being associated with stripping and/or their sexuality (and sensuality??  I think I need to do a little soul searching to make sure I truly understand the difference between those words!!).  It is also clear that some people are trying to distance themselves and talk about the fitness, acrobatic and strength side of pole fitness.  

Does it mean that strippers or pole dancers aren't also into pole fitness?

Here are a couple of my past posts on the subject:

http://lolorashel.blogspot.com/2011/03/when-i-grow-up-i-wanna-be-stripper.html

http://lolorashel.blogspot.com/2011/02/strippers-get-breast-cancer-too.html

I feel like I have been caught with my pants down on occasion on this subject.  Not because I haven't chosen a side, but because I don't HAVE a side.  I have never stripped but I am not against strippers.  However, at the same time, clearly society's negative view of stripping occasionally may creep into my words because some people have taken things I have written as negative comments against strippers.  

Example:  I wrote this blog for The Pole Dancing Shop:  http://www.thepoledancingshop.com/pole-dancing-and-your-significant-other/#.TxBrtIHnuSo

The post is about presenting your decision to begin pole dancing to a partner who may be concerned or jealous.  My comment was:  "If they are stuck on the 'stripper thing,' try to move past it by saying that you have no intentions of becoming a stripper, and that this adventure is about you finding your sexy side and building your own confidence."  One person ripped the post for being anti-stripper.  I felt bad because that wasn't my intention but it is certainly true that a lot of people in society associate pole dancing with stripping and that can cause a problem in some relationships.  I am not making a judgment about whether it is wrong or right, but it is what it is.  

I tried to make amends by writing another post for The Pole Dancing Shop:  http://www.thepoledancingshop.com/a-brief-history-of-pole-dance/#.TxBqJ4HnuSo

In it, I included my very favorite quote from Claire of The Pole Story:  "If for some reason, the idea of your dancing being connected to the strip club scene is upsetting to you, if you desperately need to distance what you do from what those 'other girls' do, if you truly believe that you are doing this because it’s just a really good workout, then I strongly suggest you spend some time thinking about why you chose pole dancing.  Because there are a million ways to get fit without putting on six inch stilettos, a bikini and swinging sensually around a pole."   So then some of the anti-stripper people jumped in to comment that they were different from strippers because they didn't take their clothes off.

*sigh*  I just can't win so I should stop while I'm ahead. 

Then last night I read Michelle Shimmy's first blog post about having thick skin:  http://shimmypolediary.blogspot.com/2012/01/first-blog-ever-thick-skin.html  

One thing I took away from the post was that I cannot make everyone happy all of the time (of which I was aware but clearly needed to be reminded).  But this quote in particular struck a chord in me:  It's completely normal that not everyone will like what you do. As the pole movement gains momentum, and new skills are created, it's going to get harder and harder to impress people. People will become more discerning, and competitive. Sometimes, people will comment on other people's style of dance as a way of defining their own style. An example of this is a traditional "sexy" pole dancer saying she doesn't like contemporary pole, or a former ballerina saying she hates body rolls and hair flicks. What they're really saying is that they've adopted a particular style as their favourite way to pole dance, to the exclusion of other styles. That's ok too - there's room enough in the pole world for many different ways of pole dancing, and it's quite exciting to see new styles develop and change.

She's right!  There is room for EVERY kind of style.  You can be a pole dancer, an aerial artist, a pole fitness fanatic, or a stripper...whatever you want!  You can love to dance to classical music or hard rock music.  You can focus on amazing tricks or sexy floor work.  You can do whatever you want because THAT is the beauty of ART.  Dance is art.  And you are the artist.  Your art may not be beautiful to someone else, but as long as you're happy, that is all that matters.

Until next time, lovelies, happy twirling!